Ok, so I re-activated. Once I figured out that all I had to do to re-activate was log in, I kind of thought going cold turkey seemed a little extreme. My dear husband mowed over the cable line on Saturday, so I went 2 whole days with NO internet or cable tv. Now, the "no tv" meant nothing to me, because I rarely watch it. (although I am developing a love for "Duck Dynasty". Very incongruous with my personality but I do love those redneck millionaires.)
I was surprised at how nice it was just not to have the distraction of any of it... Facebook, email, tv, etc. So when the cable guy showed up Monday morning, I was determined to only check email. No blog stats, and definitely not Facebook. Then I realized I needed some info from a person I usually only communicate with via Facebook. And then I got a text from a friend saying "Would you PLEASE just resign our game on Words with Friends??? It is just sitting there driving me crazy and I can't do anything about it!" And then I got a phone call from a friend my daughter babysits for (arrangements usually made via Facebook messages) who said she had to hunt down my number because she didn't have it saved, and THEN the icing on the proverbial cake.... My dear mom let me know that my dad was disappointed that I wasn't going to be posting about the kids. Because that is how he keeps up with us, and no girl can stand to disappoint her Daddy!! I know. Excuses, excuses, and more excuses. But I did it. I re-activated.
Here are the changes I am implementing to help me control the time spent on Facebook:
1. I updated my email preferences so that private messages would be sent to my email as well, so that if someone needs to reach me who does not have my email/phone number, it is still possible to do it via Facebook.
2. I am not staying logged in after I post something to see if anyone comments. In some cases, I just turn the whole computer off so that it isn't luring me to the desk with that little green light.
3. I am only logging into Facebook when I am truly on a "break"... Meaning, my kids don't need me, there isn't a pile of laundry screaming at me to be folded, and my husband isn't around to hang out or snuggle with.
4. No games. Period. (no judgement if you play them, I just think this is where my downward spiral began!)
5. I am not mindlessly scrolling through my newsfeed to see what my friends are all up to. This was a huge time waster for me.
In true addict fashion, I am telling myself I can do this, that there is no need to give it up entirely, and that my reasons are valid. But I am still praying about whether I am walking in freedom, and exercising self-control, or if I am tiptoeing up to that line of disobedience. I never want to be legalistic about anything. But I do want to be in the center of God's will. So I am praying for discernment.
I really, truly, whole-heartedly welcome your comments and thoughts, particularly about this post. And I welcome the accountability... So if you see me hanging out on Facebook a little more than usual, you might just send me a friendly reminder of my commitment to cut back... (you Truth-loving friends of mine will have no trouble with this, and I am thankful for you!!)
So, don't be alarmed or surprised if I do the yo-yo thing with this for a while. (I have the old song playing in my head "I don't know why I go to extremes...") That is the problem with sharing my struggles with whomever chooses to read about them... You get to watch me try, mess it up, try again, and possibly fail... And then try to make sense of it all! Humbling, indeed.
That's all folks. At least for today. Stay tuned for further developments.